Do you ever feel overcommitted? Overwhelmed? Often I struggle with these feelings. Being the detailed-oriented person that I am, I calculate the time it takes for each task, and realize there is no way I am going to get it all done. I become disappointed in myself, frustrated and irritable with my daughters. Then I feel guilty, it can be a vicious cycle. Sometimes, it even brings me to the brink of despair.
Commitment is a very admirable trait. It brings order out of chaos. It focuses one’s energies and structures one’s day. The question I have to ask myself, time and time again, commitment to what?
Am I using my time, talent, and treasure for the ultimate commitment?
As a Christian, that commitment is Jesus. He is the way, the truth, and the Light. He shows me the way, he tells me the truth, and he shines the light into my pit of despair and chaos. Jesus is the fulfillment of the Law, God’s commitment to us. Jesus came to save us from ourselves, from all the other commitments we place before our relationship with God.
For real commitment, I must accept Jesus in my life, and let go of control. I must surrender my day to Him, and let He lead me in what I do, think, and say.
“To love the Lord, our God with our whole heart, mind, strength, and soul; and to love our neighbor as one self.” (Matthew 22:37-39)
I know the Truth, yet I still struggle. We all do, we are humans. Yet, in this struggle, I have a choice.
Judas and Peter also struggled. Both disciples betrayed Jesus, Judas, for 30 pieces of silver, and Peter by denying Christ three times before the cock crowed. Judas let his feelings of despair and guilt overwhelm him. He hung himself. Peter, on the other hand, sought forgiveness in Jesus. He became the rock on which Christ built his Church.
Every day I too have a choice. Every night, I can reflect on the day and ask for repentance and reconciliation. Every morning, I can recommit myself. However, like Peter, I must realize that my commitment is only possible through the grace of God, a gift freely given.
Good Morning Jesus, my day is yours.